Divorce Discreetly: Is Mediation for You?


Divorce in New MexicoDivorce is never easy. And sometimes, it is necessary. But if a couple is decided to go their separate ways and don’t want all the drama attendant to most divorces, there is an alternative. The outcome is still divorce, where the marriage is legally over.

And there are still arrangements. What is absent with this option is going through court proceedings that can be protracted and are often emotional.


First, taking the divorce mediation path means the spouses agree to divorce and want to settle things quietly. Instead of a judge and court room, there is a divorce mediator that will work with the couple. The mediator can be an Albuquerque divorce lawyer, but not necessarily so except that they are well versed not only about divorce but also family law. More importantly, the mediator must be neutral, never advocating for either spouse.

Goal of This Process

The goal is to resolve issues in the most amicable way that will be fair to both parties. This will include finances and properties, custody over children and support and alimony. Each party still have their individual attorneys that are present during the mediation proceedings and the final signing of the divorce agreement.

Mediation Isn’t for Everyone

This alternative is not for every marriage. It requires open lines of communication and being open-minded. Its goal is to come to an agreement in a shorter period, while being discreet about it to maintain good relations after the deed is done. It is also to spare the kids the emotional rollercoaster ride that is common in most divorces.

However, if it does not work, the couple would have wasted time and effort. Another downside is it might not complete or it only favors one spouse instead of being fair to both parties. Thus it is best to get a good mediator for the process.

Better Relations

One advantage of the process is it usually allows a couple to work through their differences in a way that will be good for the children because they need to work together as parents. It also fosters better communication between both parties, making it easier to come to terms, even while ending the relationship.

Divorce is costly, not just on the finances but on emotions. If there is a way to go through with it without going through all the pain, wouldn’t it be better for all?

Child Visitation Arrangements and Schedules for the Divorced


DivorceDivorce is already a heavy subject, which becomes even heavier if a child is part of it. Children need both their parents as they grow up, but due to circumstances like this, they have to live separately. The court sees the importance of this issue and gives visitation rights to make sure it won’t affect them significantly.

What are the Types of Visitation?

Depending on the agreement, you or the court may decide on the type of visitation. Divorce lawyers in Suffolk County, NY noted that this is to be sure the visit is still in the best interests of the child. It shouldn’t put them at risk, physically or mentally.

• Unsupervised – The non-custodial parent can visit and see their child without the presence of a third party. This is ideal if there’s no threat to the well-being of the child.

• Supervised – This takes place under the order of the court. They’ll appoint a third party to make sure the child is safe, especially if the non-custodial parent poses a threat. In some cases, this type of visitation involves a mental health professional.

What if You’re Not in Good Terms with Your Ex-Partner?

Conflict is one of the leading reasons couples decide to end their relationship, so it’s no surprise that some of them are not in good terms after the court grants their divorce. There are cases when it’s not the ex-partners, but their parents and new partners. To make the visitation easier for the non-custodial parent, you can ask to set a specific order like the following examples:

• Every weekend or every first and third weekend of the month

• During school holidays and breaks, especially summer and spring

• Special events, like family celebrations and events

Regular visitations are still an important part of your child’s upbringing. Make sure to plan this carefully with your ex-partner, so it won’t affect the well-being of your child as they grow up.

The Two Sides of Self-Defense: Perfect and Imperfect


LawWhen you’re charged with a criminal case and plead self-defense, your claim can be considered perfect or imperfect. The former occurs when there is a need to use force (in some other cases, deadly force) to defend yourself from an imminent danger. This involves no wrongdoing on your part, and is usually available for most violent crimes.

The case for imperfect self-defense, however, is a lot different. This involves an unreasonable perception or belief that fatal force is required, or some unacceptable behavior on your part. It is does not excuse you from the crime of using violence, but it can reduce the penalties and charges. Not all states, however, recognize imperfect self-defense.

Unreasonable Perception

In states that allow imperfect self-defense, it only applies if you kill someone, with an invalid perception that there was a threat of death or injury, or force was needed to stop the imminent danger. This means that you believe (although considered unreasonable) that you (or someone close to you) were in great danger, and killed a person because of that perception.

Deadly Force Must be Valid

Criminal defense law firms like DNTrialLaw.com notes that if you present evidence, following that there is a need for self-defense, imperfect and perfect self-defense could apply. The defense will only be successful if your belief of using force was valid or reasonable. The jury will determine the validity and reason behind your perception or belief.

Reduction of Criminal Charges

In murder cases, perfect self-defense will likely result in acquittal, while an imperfect claim will lead to reduction of a manslaughter charge or penalties. Perfect self-defense is the only type of claim available in manslaughter cases. When it comes to imperfect self-defense, it is an admission that you committed voluntary manslaughter.

The requirements for the imperfect self-defense claim vary even in those states that recognize it. It is still best to talk to an experienced criminal case attorney. The right lawyer can explain the law and help present your argument.